From Gaijin to Local: Navigating 5 Japanese Dating Sites with Ease

It’s almost Valentine’s Day, and that means you need to get your knob slobbed on very quickly - otherwise, your penis shrinks and you lose your semen count via excessive masturbation in public bathrooms. Most of you are probably ignoring all of the advice that a genius like I have given you (for free, by the way) - and that’s why you’re wondering what the best “dating sites” are for Japan.

I don’t use dating sites, mainly because the women who use dating sites are used up bags of flesh who have more semen in them than a Hatsune Miku body pillow. In Japan, “e-dating” or “long distance” stuff does not really work. In fairness, it never works, but it especially won’t work if you’re some flabby American retard who dropped out of college and looking to score some yellow poon.

You mainly want to use these Japanese dating sites as a way to meet somebody while YOU are in Japan. Not when you’re in America and looking for a “reason” to go. You need to meet people and go out with them quickly. Some of the dating sites are familiar to most of you, and other ones may be new.

If my name is Yellowfever X because I love to pipe down little Asian women with my massive rod of steel, Gaijin Hunters are the opposite. That’s how they describe the women who I sleep with (because they want to sleep with white men) and typically want a person to teach them English to help them with their make-believe career as a Nintendo Saleswoman.

These people are also called English Vampires since they want to suck you of all your English-speaking knowledge. Extra bonus points if she does suck you. You might see them constantly hanging around bars where lots of foreign teachers hang out.

A big thing about Japan is that they assume all white people are rich. Not true, considering most white people I’ve met in Japan are poor and think that making $20,000 USD teaching snot-nosed retarded children English is somehow a “good living”. 

Due to that, they’ll think you can travel the world with them. I’ve never brought an Asian woman outside of Asia to come on my adventures. I prefer to leave exotic things in exotic lands, not bring them back to Detroit. 

Here’s the thing though. You may be seen as “prey”, but as long as you’re not a loser degenerate who catches feelings quickly you can just sleep with them and dump them. The hunters can become the hunted if you’re smart and not a mongoloid.

Tinder is probably the most well-known dating app in the world, and it is in Japan. However, you’ll quickly find that there are some issues with using Tinder in Japan. Firstly, most women in Japan are shy - not because they’re unattractive, but because they’re worried that an Indian IT worker will meet up with them and grope them on the train (and no woman wants their vagina to smell like curry).

Since most men are sex-starved degenerates who fall in love quickly, they’ll probably end up blowing this poor girl's phone up with messages and harassing them nonstop. A lot of the women on Japanese Tinder will take photos of their food and various geographical shots to prevent creeps from knowing who they are. At the end of the day, most of the Japanese women you’ll meet will be fairly attractive. Once a girl becomes comfortable with you, they’ll send you a picture of what they look like.

From what the interns tell me, a lot of people will use Tinder as a way to help their English conversational skills. I don’t know if you’ve ever used “Duolingo” or another language app, but typical conversations are pretty boring and not in-depth at all. It’s a bit easier once you’re actually talking to the person. It also helps to know some Japanese so you don’t look like a stuttering retard.

All in all, Tinder is a pretty solid service to use. As a man, I’d suggest you probably subscribe to it since Tinder will boost your profile if you do. Now, a lot of brown people use Tinder and typically Asian women don’t like brown guys - so if you’re white that’ll be a big bonus for you. If you’re a woman, simply existing is enough to get dicked down.

While it is not necessarily a “dating” app, HelloTalk is a great way to build relationships and connections with women who can barely understand you. Back in the day, it used to be exclusively for exchanging language skills. Now it’s become more used as an “international dating app”.

As I mentioned earlier, I don’t like people e-dating or having long-distance relationships. It simply does not work and never will work. That’s why soldiers are constantly hanging themselves when their wife cheats on them. HelloTalk has also been invaded by a lot of Indian and Middle Eastern people, who scared away all the women by giving off major creep vibes and asking for vagene pics.

If you have a good head on your shoulders, you’d probably be able to make use of HelloTalk. Talk to some girl from Japan while in Japan, learn their language, and help her learn English. It’s like a true romantic movie, except you just want to have sex with her and she’s using you as bragging points to her friends (or to pass an exam).

Most relationships are totally transactional in the modern era with no hint of romance or true genuine love. So just use her and she’ll use you. It’s worth a download at least, especially if you’re too scared to meet people at a bar.

Bumble is active in Japan, and many of the people on Bumble will actually speak in English to you. Bumble is primarily used by a “younger” crowd, typically all under 35. If you’re a bit older you may want to avoid Bumble, since the women have to message first. If you have obvious signs of wealth it’ll be easier for you.

That’s the big “rule” with Bumble. The women are the “queen bees” and they pick what little worker drone (YOU) gets to impregnate them. Bumble is a bit bad since you can use it for free, and typically sites that have a free model are using you.

The big downside with Bumble is that much like Tinder, it’s designed for bored girls to get a massive ego boost because they’ll have thousands of matches. When they’re dealing with beta males it makes them feel powerful. Of course, when they meet a real man like me they’re begging me to throw them through a glass table. 

For you, you’ll be lucky to get a couple of good matches. Quickly try to take them out on an in-person date. Bumble isn’t designed for long-distance relationships.

Pairs pretty much sums up the male dating experience. Women can join Pairs for free (actual women, not troons) whereas men have to pay fees to join. Men have to pay roughly $25 USD a month to join. $25 USD is nothing if you’re a high valued male such as myself, who has tens of millions of dollars in liquid cash in his checking account (and even more invested in every single Japanese pachinko parlor - I own all of them).

Most of the loser NEETs who occupy Tinder and Bumble are scared of using paid dating services, mainly because they think that they’re special little boys who should have women flocking to them for their attention. Pairs is perfect if you’re wanting to be serious, since showing that you can pay for basic shit means you can actually take women out on dates (and not make them pay for everything).

Pairs is also home to a lot of Gaijin Hunters, but mainly the ones looking for fugly white women who need to date outside their race. You’ll find some pictures of gross white women dating gross looking Asian dudes, just so their dad is super pissed off with them. They also might be confusing Japanese men for Korean men - since a lot of depressed fat white women love K-Pop.

The website is worth a look at if you’re hoping to secure a “long lasting” relationship as they’re wanting to find marriage. For this white woman, she wanted a way to live in Japan and consume endless amounts of anime while flicking her bean.

I think Tapple is great because women have to spend $20 USD a month to subscribe and men have to pay $50 USD. This means that the women have to have some money (can’t live at home collecting child support like most girls), and the men have to be high value entrepreneurs like myself who can blow $50 USD a month on finding women to sleep with.

You’re going to want to subscribe to the higher priced plan, since if you cheap out and go for the “easy” option you’ll never get anywhere in life. Also, the women and men on Tapple are far more attractive than the other sites. You probably shouldn’t look for a real long lasting relationship on any of these sites as a “gaijin”, you should fly in and ruin existing relationships and help people cheat on their Asian partners.

Tapple boasts that “10,000 couples per month” are happening thanks to Tapple. For some reason, I highly doubt that number since most Japanese people are horny and will sleep with anything in sight.

My real advice to all my adoring fans is this. I think you may want to steer clear of online dating, especially because it’s easy to fall into a trap where you just text a girl endlessly or Facetime her. If you use these apps, please actually be IN Japan and take these girls (or guys) out on real dates.

Too many young men are lost and think that women need to prove themselves to them. That’s not how it works. If you want to be a masculine person, you need to take charge. Sitting around chatting shit online with a girl for months on end isn’t going to get you anywhere.

Use these sites as a “tool” to create a list of people you can hit up. Don’t rely on it to make connections with people while halfway across the world.